Crazy Roberto Cavalli Parrot Top

($470, Roberto Cavalli, Theoutnet.com)

I hate it so much I almost love it. It's like Miami barfed all over silk and Roberto Cavalli swooped in and made a top out of the whole mess.

McQ Lace Panel Dress Is Doing Shit To My Head

($92, McQ, theOutnet.com)

I can't even begin to tell you the nasty things this grey and hot pink lace McQ dress is whispering to me. They're BAD. Things I've never even heard of or thought about doing. But I'm thinking of doing them. It's BAD. I'm hooked... Also, I have to keep reminding myself that I'M. NOT. WEALTHY. WHY DO I KEEP FORGETTING THAT? Seriously, this McQ dress is BREAKING DOWN MY RESOLVE.

Usher - New Music - More Music Videos

theOutnet.com's Shoe Collection Is Giving Me Inappropriate Urges

Seriously, I'm getting tingly... now the tingling is turning to numbness. I may or may not be blacking out. Isn't this how Michael Hutchence died?

Check out theOutnet's -- Net-a-Porter's younger, hipper, CHEAPER, sister -- shoe selects. Designer shoes, discount prices.

($238, Chloe, theoutnet.com)


($199, Chloe, theoutnet.com)



($115, Marc Jacobs, theoutnet.com)

($232, Bally, theoutnet.com)

Gahhhh these silver Bally heels so have my name on them. Unfortunately, my credit cards have my name on them too.

($532, Christian Louboutin, theoutnet.com)

Usually I don't freak out and make a total jackass out of myself and act all like OMFG SEX AND THE CITY IS MY FAVORITE MOVIE AND I NEED JIMMY CHOOS AND LOUBOUTINS BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT CARRIE BRADSHAW WORE AND OUR LIVES ARE SOOOOOO ALIKE BECAUSE WE BOTH LIKE BOYS AND HAVE GIRL FRIENDS AND LIKE CLOTHES AND LAPTOPS and shit over Louboutins, but these Prive Louboutins are spesh.